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Et Tu, Brute?Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears. We come not to bury Caesar but to celebrate his fantastic sense of style. Imagine all the things that Julius Caesar accomplished in his lifetime. He led a the mightiest of armies. He named himsel
Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears. We come not to bury Caesar but to celebrate his fantastic sense of style. Imagine all the things that Julius Caesar accomplished in his lifetime. He led a the mightiest of armies. He named himself dictator of the Roman Empire. He conquered Gaul – not that Gaul’s natives appreciated this acheivement. “We were FINE, Caesar!” they said. “Go open your national smoothie chain somewhere else!” Or something like that. None of these successes can compare to the fact that he made a breastplate, a man-skirt, and knee-high, lace-up sandals look good. People are still wearing his footwear thousands of years later. That’s a real victory!
Your subjects will be in awe of your lordly threads when you wear your Julius Caesar men’s costume! The sleeveless polyester jersey is pullover-style, because ain’t nobody got time to work buttons when they’re leading a military charge or running from 60 murderous Roman senators. A red satin cape billows impressively behind you as you stride across the battlefield. It attaches to a gold collar that’s printed with some awe-inspiring winged lions and filigree detail. Matching armbands keep you protected while you battle and the accompanying gold laurel is perfect for encircling your noble brow. If you really want to be daring, nix the shirt! Nothing says confidence like a Roman dictator.
You’re all that and more! Embrace the daring and devil-may-care duds of one of history’s greatest warriors as you claim your destiny (we hope it includes plenty of glory and very few pointy knives). Strut into the Senate with your head held high. Unless it’s the Ides of March – then staying home and watching TV is the name of the game!
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