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I'll Go Last, ThanksMost people like to be first. It's nice not having to wait for things! Who wouldn't want to jump to the head of a line, score the first tickets for a favorite band, or get served before anyone else at a restaurant? The only time that be
Most people like to be first. It’s nice not having to wait for things! Who wouldn’t want to jump to the head of a line, score the first tickets for a favorite band, or get served before anyone else at a restaurant? The only time that being first isn’t as exciting is when you’re one of the first to get murdered by a famous serial killer. You want to be one of his later targets so that you can learn from the murderer’s past actions and have the best chance of survival (or, you know, not be one of his targets at all. That’s probably the best-case scenario here.) Besides, if you’re one of the first, you’re typically not remembered for much…unless you happen to give the killer his famous outfit for his murdering sprees. Maybe that counts for something?
Make friends and passers-by do a terrified double-take when they see you in this exclusive Blue Mechanic Coveralls Murderer Costume! This blue number came from a hapless mechanic who wasn’t fast enough to escape your hands. The jumpsuit is long-sleeved and zips up the front. You can wear it over your street clothes to cover the blood spatter. A collar, a breast pocket, and pockets on the back of the pants add authenticity.
It’s kind of strange that more killers haven’t adapted this outfit. It’s roomy! It’s comfy! It’s perfect for hiding evidence, or for walking slowly after your shrieking victims (and yet somehow still managing to catch them). Give it time and you might end up being a trendsetter.
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